By Vita Forest
What do I like about him? Where do I start?
We can talk, really talk and he listens to me. He’s a really good listener. He hears me. He asks questions and remembers things I’ve said. He’s not black and white about everything. He is curious and open-minded, even about some of my crazy habits – and not in a patronizing kind of way either. He makes me feel like I am just about the most interesting person he is ever likely to come across.
There are little things too. He reads. And not just magazines. We can talk about books. Can you imagine? Sometimes we curl up together and read, not talking, reading. He likes Margaret Atwood, Tim Winton and Wallace Stegner. He has read Michael Ondaatje – and not just The English Patient. He has books beside his bed. He makes time to read. There was this one day we had a picnic and we hardly spoke – just lay there beside each other, barefoot in the sun. Reading and sipping red wine out of plastic glasses and holding hands. (He has a very good picnic set which lives in his car – a good sign, I think).
He is calm. Things don’t get to him. He puts things in perspective and doesn’t make a big deal of nothing. He doesn’t fly off the handle. He is peaceful. Maybe that’s because he gardens. Nearly every day. He potters about with his plants. His garden is really beautiful. And he likes to visit them. He is a garden nerd like me.
And he has integrity, in his work of course, but in how he lives his life. He likes being part of a community. He likes to contribute and he is happy with what he does. He takes the time to acknowledge that. He is loyal. He cares for his family (who are lovely by the way). And his friends love him, they are very protective of him, and I think they have accepted me. I think I have their tick of approval. They are looking after his heart.
We have the same outlook, the same ideals. I never used to think much about that, I never used to think it mattered, but it does. This is so easy, so good.
He is an optimist. He has a lovely way of looking at the world. And being around him make me feel positive too.
And I like the way he looks, which always helps…
He makes me feel calm. And he makes me feel happy. Well, you noticed the way I have this silly grin on my face.
And he is kind. Do you know how much that means to me? That did not used to be on my list, but now it’s right up there at the top. He is a kind person. He helps people, he is thoughtful. Not in big showy ways – which I don’t believe in anymore anyway. He is a genuinely good person.
I’m waiting for the rose-coloured glasses to come off. I’m waiting for the honeymoon to end, but at the moment, what do I like about him?